5 Quick Steps Toward Self-Acceptance
Figuring out who you are, and accepting yourself for who you are is the only way to have a happy, fulfilled life. It’s hard to fully love others if you can’t love yourself. Feeling better about yourself can help you feel better about everything else in your world.
I did many, many years of therapy and one of the things that stuck with me was that before I could make any positive changes, I had to figure out and really come to terms with who I was at the core of my being. Think about it, you can’t change negative behavior or thoughts if you don’t accept that they are actually there. Once you accept who you are, you can become the leader, the friend, the mother, the whatever it is that you want to be.
1. Don’t worry about making your parents proud. I know. It sounds silly. But the need to make your parents, or parental figures proud and to live up to their expectations is an obstacle standing in the way of your self-acceptance. What they want from you, and who they want you to be is a reflection of them. Learn that it has no bearing on you.
2. Love what you’re good at. Do you juggle? Sing? Master of the Rubik’s Cube? (Yeah, I’m old) No matter what your “thing” is, embrace it. Want to know what I’m good at? Singing off key at the top of my lungs during road trips. Seriously, and I say this a lot, figure it out and then write it down. Everything that you’re good at from being able to recite the alphabet backwards to being an awesome friend to heart surgery. There’s plenty of room between those things for you to fill in. Get your list together.
3. Start Learning. If there’s something that you don’t know how to do and you’ve always wanted to, learn it. There are way too many resources out there for you to be wistful about not learning French. Go for it. And if you suck at it, fine! At least you tried and you can add it to the list of things you’ve done even if you can’t put it on the What You’re Good At list.
4. Be Reasonable. This one can be hard for me. I was often told that I have unreasonable expectations of myself and this is why I know why this is so important If you are 40 and have a goal of being a prima ballerina and you have never taken a ballet lesson, this may not be reasonable. Take the lessons, have fun, let go of the expectations.
5. Forgive yourself and others. If you are holding on to grudges, this will stand in the way of accepting yourself. If you’ve been wronged, I am not saying to forget, but I do think that finding a way to forgive and move past trauma, even forgiving yourself for trauma that you may have caused others, is key to self-acceptance.
Have you ever noticed that you freely accept other people as themselves, warts and all? Now it’s time to do that for yourself. Focus on the positive accept yourself as you are. Want to learn more? https://www.retreatsatresorts.com/events/thailand-sense-of-self-retreat